Get Back

This past Wednesday, my baby brother, Joe, celebrated his 16^th birthday.  Because Joe shares my love of the Beatles, a blog dedicated to him was the obvious choice for this week.  He and I like to have jam sessions together, him on the guitar, me on the piano, and both of us singing (poorly.)  One of the songs we used to play was the Beatle’s title Get Back from the album Let it Be.  Coincidentally, the song is about man named Jojo. 

Spending time with my brother is one of the things I miss most since I left home.  I’m proud to say that we have a great relationship—Joe’s been one of my best friends for 16 years.  There’s never a dull moment with him.  We celebrate Music Mondays, our own little tradition of dedicating every Monday evening to listening to music together.  We fly across the country every year, just the two of us, to visit family.  We stay up to watch Saturday Night Live.  We spend hours in the summer tossing baseballs, just chatting.  We beat each other up, but we never fight.  This is the first of his birthdays I wasn’t there for—I used to make his cake every year—and I’m pretty bummed about it.

Jojo from Get Back reminds me of Joe, and not just because it’s a song we used to sing together.  “Jojo was a man who thought he was a loner, but he knew it couldn’t last.”  For a 16-year-old guy, Joe’s got such a cool personality.  He’s very relaxed, very friendly.  He’s an awesome guitar player.  He’s an encyclopedia of random knowledge.  He’s one of those people who can crack a hilarious joke with a completely straight face.  “Jojo left his home in Tuscan, Arizona, for some California grass.”  One of the things I admire most about Joe is his ability to pave his own way in life, regardless of what is expected of him.  For example, he likes Hawaiian shirts… you know, with the buttons down the front and the big hibiscus flowers.  Wearing them, he definitely stands out in a crowd of self conscious young men in tight Abercrombie and Fitch tees, and that’s perfectly fine with him. “Get back, get back, get back to where you once belonged.”  Joe knows his place in the world, and he’s not afraid to be himself.  I’m proud to say that he’s my little brother.

“Get back, Jojo!”

Blackbird

TONS of Beatles songs, especially from their earlier albums, are written about love, but I didn’t pick one of them even though that's exactly what I'm writing about.  The song of the week is Blackbird from the Beatles White Album.  To me, it’s a very powerful tune, and no other song could better represent a post about the three most powerful words in the English language:  I, love, and you.

You can probably guess where I’m going with this—last weekend, my boyfriend of two months, Colin, told me that he loves me for the first time.  I was completely shocked and squealed excitedly as I wrapped my arms around him, barely managing to squeak out a, “Reeeeaaaaalllly?!”  He began to explain himself, “Maybe it’s too soon to say this, but…” Realizing that in my elation I had forgotten to reciprocate, I looked straight into his eyes and finally said it.  “Colin, I love you too.”

I apologize for the sappiness of the post, but it was a sappy moment.  After saying the words back and forth a few more times just because they felt so new and wonderful, we literally just beamed at each other and hugged, both realizing the significance of what had just happened. 

“I love you” is an enormous thing to say to a person, and saying it for the first time must be taken with caution.  It can’t be said too early.  A premature “I love you” is a red flag to me—someone who can fall in love too quickly can fall out just as fast.  Unfortunately, there’s no prescribed amount of time a man must wait before saying the big three words because relationships are so unique and personal.  I say “a man” because, in my opinion, it is absolutely his job to say “I love you” first.  Also, when he’s saying it for the first time, he has to, has to, has to be sober, or else it’s perceived meaningless.  Similarly, “I love you” must be sincere.  Ladies, I’d say we’re pretty good at detecting bulls*%$, wouldn’t you agree?

Luckily Colin met all of these prerequisites, and it’s the craziest thing in the world.  It’s literally a physical feeling—I can feel it in my chest.  It’s heavy and light at the same time, like chocolate mousse.  It spreads through my whole body and I feel weightless, like I’m floating.  It’s the feeling of the first day of spring, that birthday feeling, that Christmas morning feeling.  It’s indescribable but unmistakable, and I’m smiling, smiling, smiling at everything.  It’s terrifying and it’s breathtaking, like a “blackbird singing in the dead of night.”  When it’s real, nothing that has happened in the past is really important.  With Colin, I can “take these broken wings and learn to fly.”  I’ve said it before:  I didn’t expect this and I wasn’t even looking for this, but I know now that “all [my] life, [I] was only waiting for this moment to arise.”

“Blackbird fly,

Into the light of the dark black night.”

Good Day Sunshine

Have you ever noticed how happy everyone is during the first warm days of spring?  As we shed our winter coats, morale gradually improves, and when the thermometer finally hits 70 degrees, everyone just seems to be ecstatic.  I know I am! The Beatle's song Good Day Sunshine from their 1966 album Revolver captures this springtime exuberance.  Even though I love the trees turning in autumn and the first snowfall of the winter, nothing can beat that wonderful feeling of getting my sundresses and flip flops out again and basking in the warmth of spring, especially when it happens in March!

The research about whether or not weather actually affects morale is inclusive.  However, some studies have proven that the optimal temperature for Americans is about 72 degrees, just what the thermostat has read all week!  I love to be outside, so when the weather gets warm, I'm so excited to lay in the grass and study, to take walks, to play volleyball in Pollock quad, to catch frisbees... I even love to keep my window open at night and just listen to the sounds of the great outdoors.  I've also noticed that when temperatures rise, I'm suddenly irritable and antsy whenever I'm forced to stay indoors.  For me, the weather definitely contributes to my mood, especially in the springtime.  All winter long "I need to laugh." Then, when March rolls around, "And when the sun is out, I've got something I can laugh about."  As spring blossoms in State College, "I feel good in a special way."


"I'm in love and it's a sunny day.
Good day sunshine, Good day sunshine."


I'm done writing.  I'm going outside.

Octopus's Garden

Octopus's Garden is one of the Beatles' stranger works (although it's definitely not their strangest!)  Written by their drummer Ringo Starr (one of only two songs he wrote for the band), it is literally about octopuses who supposedly look for shiny objects along the sea bed with which to make gardens.  I don't know if that's really true, but nonetheless, it's a fantastically bizarre and fun song.  To me, this song is about longing to just be somewhere else for a little while.  This week, the place I want to be is home.

I love Happy Valley, and I call Penn State my home, but with spring break starting tomorrow, I'm really excited to be home home.  I don't go back to my hometown often, and I'm definitely ready to see my puppy, spend time with my family, sleep in my own quiet bedroom, shower without shoes on, go to church, and have no school work for an entire week.  

Before I came to college, I couldn't wait to just get away from home.  Growing up in a small town, I always felt suffocated.  Back then, I was longing to come to State College.  It's funny that now that I'm in State College, I sometimes long to go back home.  I'm not saying that I'm homesick, because I'm not sad about being here at all - I honestly love every minute of it.  However, I believe people are always to some extent drawn back to the place where they started out.  It's comforting to be at home where so many years of memories were made.  Going back to the place where my childhood was spent, I feel the burden of adult responsibilities and decisions lift from my shoulders.  I also think it's important to reconnect with everybody I left behind when I moved away from home.  Sometimes I don't get in touch as often as I should, but it's always wonderful to catch up with all of the people supporting me at home.  

My life is in State College now, but my roots will always be at home.  After eight weeks of hard work at school, I'm ready to go away for awhile.  "I'd like to be under the sea."  It's definitely time for some well deserved relaxation "In an octopuses's garden in the shade." (Oh, and if you watch the video, please enjoy the very nice footage of playful octopi!)

"We would be so happy you and me, no one there to tell us what to do.

I'd like to be under the sea, in an octopus's garden with you."